Rating: All ages
Word Count: 1218 / 1973
Author's Summary: A "Doomsday" fix-it parody. Unnecessary's mother always said she'd run off with the Valeyard if he promised to blow up 18th century France. The problem being that until now, they'd always figured she'd been joking.
Characters/Pairings: Ten, Rose, Jackie, Pete, Martha, Romana III, Leela, Borusa, The Valeyard, other characters
Warnings: Crack. (My warning, not the author's.)
Recced because: Obviously I am blatantly cheating here, but you get two fics for the price of one, so stop complaining. The first story, "The Woe of Unnecessary Name Tyler", claims to be a parody of a "Doomsday" fix-it. This isn't a genre with which I'm overly familiar, but that's okay, because Willdew is also taking a broad swipe at that deathless genre, the babyfic. Yes, Rose has spawned, and if being half-Time Lord wasn't bad enough, Unnecessary Name Tyler (go read it, I'm not going to spoil the joke) has to contend with having the craziest female relatives this side of the void.
Time has obviously passed by the time we hit the sequel, "Baby's Comin' Back to Me", because as it opens, Rose has just, um, deserted the position of human ambassador to Gallifrey. Needless to say, shenanigans ensue.
These fics are short and highly silly, but they're rich in humour, and the second one takes pieces of spin-off canon and runs with them, giggling all the way. I love the characterisation of Rose, which is irreverent but affectionate: It was an impossibility perhaps to ascertain the exact nature of Rose Tyler's worth. Unnecessary figured it had to do with people liking her quite a bit. It didn't matter what language you spoke or molecular composition you came in. The plain truth of it was, everybody fancied his mum. She was pink and yellow and scrumptious all over in a way that had the lads back at Torchwood cracking the sorts of jokes that would make someone with a bit more personality quite upset indeed.
It's messy and silly, but you'll never regret reading it.