Word Count: 6023
Author's Summary: From the Best Enemies Kink Meme: "Legally Blonde (the musical) crossover, Ainley!Master/Davison!Callahan. The Master is surprised to find an older version of the Doctor working as a cutthroat lawyer, but it's okay because older men are hot." Now with more Eight and Lucie, because Sheridan Smith!Elle Woods could not be ignored.
Characters/Pairings: Five/Ainley!Master, Eight, Lucie
Recced because: OK, so, logic dictates that I should probably choose something a bit more accessible (and I did say more serious... and I doubt x_los will thank me), but I want to rec this one, so, er, here it is!
Regarding the accessibility issue though and to bring us all up to speed, know this:
In 2010 'Legally Blonde: The Musical' (surprisingly excellent, despite being a musical adapated from a film)(which I also think is surprisingly excellent) opened on London's West End starring Sheridan Smith (who plays Eight's companion Lucie Miller) as Elle Woods, and Peter Davison (Five) as Professor Callahan, who is much more villainous than the movie version of the same character (one of his songs is called 'Blood in the Water') but who still makes a move on Elle towards the end. This spiffy video advert they did has some fun visuals of Smith as Elle, and Davison as Callahan (dancing). Really all you need to know is that Five's been chameleon-arched and now thinks he's a lawyer. I just think the Legally Blonde stuff is a fun background.
Anyway, so it's a good and amusing idea. Five is so totally unlike Callahan, who is quite like Ainley!Master. There's a lot of humour to be derived from that and from misunderstandings, etc, and if you're read other x_los stuff you'll know she's good at humour. She's also very good at a) writing porn - so if you like that sort of thing, there is some of that and b) writing the Doctor/Master relationship. Nothing is easy and no conversation isn't actually a confrontation, but they like each other enough that it works if either of them are willing to admit it.
This fic also has something else to recommend it - Eight and Lucie! One of my all time favourite Team TARDISes. They are very good here, particularly Lucie, who brings some fun meta-commentary on the Doctor/Master relationship towards the end. In short: I like this fic very much – I hope you enjoy it.
“Oh,” said the Doctor, round-eyed and excited, “are you going to try to use telepathy? I didn’t even think of that–for three full seconds. Master, Master, Master, his mind is locked tight as a safe. I should know. I’ve tried to crack it.”
In fact he’d tried so hard and so frequently that the younger Doctor was convinced the older Doctor was an amorous visiting professor from Belgium with an extremely elegant walrus moustache and a very European concept of personal space. ‘Callahan’ currently had a restraining order out against him.
“No, Doctor,” the Master corrected him very patiently. “I have something rather more subtle in mind… as it were.”
The Doctor glared hard at him, his eyes narrowing suspiciously. “You’re not going to try and ‘sex me better,’ are you?”
“No, no, noooo.” The Master waved a hand to deny it. He planned to trigger a subconsciously activated psychic trance. In order to do this, he’d have to have several minutes of access to a Doctor who was relaxed, vulnerable, and maintaining eye contact with him. So, yes, during sex, but the sex was more a means to an end (and of making good use of one’s opportunities) than a psychiatric tool in and of itself.