Author: Nancy Brown
Word Count: 14122
Characters: Amy Pond, Ianto Jones, Jack Harkness, Owen Harper, Rory Williams, The Doctor (11th)
Author's Summary: Working for Torchwood Cardiff means dealing every day with aliens, time travellers, annoying co-workers, and worst of all, tourists. A day in the life of someone who'd rather be somewhere else.
Recced because: When I started reading this I was drinking coffee, and ended up with coffee over my keyboard. It's fun and extremely silly, a day in the life of Torchwood 3. Warts and all...
Before the excerpt I should mention the introduction, which adds a few more warnings including "language, character death, necrophilia, dub-con, excessive whining, incredibly offensive humour." I don't find it offensive, but tastes differ
Cardiff, Wales, United Kingdom
The noise broke into the middle of Ianto's dream: a raucous buzzing and tweeting, like the repetitious caw of a thousand angry ... somethings. Birds? The dream morphed into terror -- giant, slouching, with skeletal black wings and razor-like beak -- then scattered to rags as he opened his eyes.
The noise continued.
Everything was dark. Ianto thrashed his limbs, did not encounter another body but did manage to unwind the blanket he'd wrapped around himself twice as he half-rolled, half-fell onto the floor. As he became more alert, he saw that he was nowhere near his bed but in fact had slept naked in the wardrobe.
His mobile kept ringing. He stumbled to where he'd dropped it on the night stand, flipped it open, and said in a sleep-roughened voice, "Yeah?"
"I woke you up."
Ianto rubbed a hand over his face. Events from the previous night made their presence known in his memory, pickled with a bit too much whisky and aged about three hours. "Did you catch the Weevil, then?" When the call came, Jack had kissed him stupid and told him to stay put. As Ianto had just experienced a fantastic orgasm, backed up against the wall of his wardrobe and buffered by shirts and suit coats, he hadn't been in the mood to argue.
"Yeah. Piece of cake. I didn't want to wake you, so I came back here."
"I need you to get dressed and head in." Jack's tone was apologetic, but Ianto heard the distinct sound of his lover sliding back into boss mode. Jack may have sucked Ianto's brains out through points south last night, but this morning, he was all work.