Word Count: 3499
Author's Summary: "Tegan," said the Doctor. "You could have just told me what you wanted to go shopping for. I've lived with a lot of women over the years. I'm not a complete stranger to undergarments." Turlough continued to be fascinated by the ceiling.
Characters/Pairings: Tegan Jovanka, Turlough, Donna Noble, Five, Ten
When I first read this, I ending up shooting tea out through my nose laughing. The fic was then instantly bookmarked for whenever I recced Calufrax next and I've read it several times whenever I need a good cheer-up. Why do I love this fic? It has some of the best Tegan and Turlough bickering I've ever seen in fic, a mash-up of two great eras, a bit of thought on the practicalities of TARDIS travel, and a really great tip on how to save your under wires from destruction while adventuring across the universe.
Also, it has koalas.
Turlough became aware of the man sitting next to him. He wore a blue suit with a red tie and trainers and was smiling crazily at Turlough. "Can I help you?"
"Well, no. No. Yes." The man stretched his feet out on the small table and put his hands behind his head. "It's just, you seem rather confident for a man surrounded by brassieres."
"No one's wearing them." Anyway, winding up Tegan was more important than expressing any discomfort. Turlough set the catalogue down. "What about you? You're rather nonchalant about the whole thing."
"Weell, been around as long as I have and you'll have seen quite a bit of women's underwear. Noooooo. No no no no no." He dropped back into sitting. "That came out wrong."
"I'm certain." Yes, Doctor. You go buy celery and I'll just keep the crazy men away from Tegan. Sounds fun.
"Let's start over." The man was practically bouncing up and down in his chair. "Hello, I'm the Doctor."